Pet loss support
After your goodbye
Losing a companion animal is a real and deep loss. Whatever you are feeling right now, there is no wrong way to grieve. Here are some gentle thoughts for the days ahead, along with trusted places to find support.
Grief after losing a pet
The bond with a pet is woven into everyday life: the morning routine, the greeting at the door, the familiar weight beside you on the couch. When that bond ends, the quiet can feel overwhelming. Grief after a pet’s death is normal, and it is often stronger than people expect.
If you are wondering whether you made the right decision, please be gentle with yourself. Choosing a peaceful goodbye, at home and free from fear and pain, is one of the most loving things a family can do.
Ways to care for yourself
- Give yourself time. There is no timeline for grief, and it rarely moves in a straight line.
- Talk about your pet with people who understand, whether friends, family, or a pet loss support line.
- Keep small routines, like meals, sleep, and a short walk, even when they feel hard.
- Create a remembrance: a photo album, a garden stone, a letter to your pet, or a paw-print keepsake.
- Put away or keep your pet’s things in your own time. There is no rush.
- Expect some harder days around anniversaries and familiar moments, and plan something gentle for them.
Helping children and other pets
Children
Use simple, honest words like “died,” rather than “put to sleep” or “went away,” which can confuse or frighten young children. Let them ask questions, share memories, and take part in a remembrance, like drawing a picture or planting a flower.
Gentle books for children:
- The Tenth Good Thing About Barney by Judith Viorst
- Dog Heaven and Cat Heaven by Cynthia Rylant
- When a Pet Dies by Fred Rogers
Other pets in the home
Animals notice the loss, too. Some search for their companion, eat less, or seek extra attention. Keeping their routines steady and giving them a little more time and affection usually helps.
If changes last more than a couple of weeks, or a pet stops eating, check in with your veterinarian.
If another pet in your home is getting older, our quality-of-life checklist can help you keep an eye on their comfort.
Trusted support resources
These free services are run by people trained in pet loss. Hours can change, so please check each website for current times.
Cornell University Pet Loss Support Hotline
A free, confidential line staffed by veterinary student volunteers trained by grief counselors. Hours vary by season.
Tufts University Pet Loss Support Helpline
Free support from trained veterinary students on weekday evenings (Eastern time). You can leave a voicemail any time and they will call you back.
Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement
Online chat rooms hosted by trained volunteers, free with a basic membership, plus a directory of pet loss counselors and support groups.
Abbey Glen online memorials
Abbey Glen Pet Memorial, which cares for our cremations, offers online memorials where you can share photos and memories of your pet.
Your pet’s aftercare
If you chose individual cremation, your pet’s ashes are returned to you in a carved wooden box. If you have questions about timing, keepsakes such as a clay paw print, or anything else after your visit, Dr. Ruth or a team member is always happy to help.
You’re welcome to reach out.
If you would like to talk, or have any questions after your goodbye, you are always welcome to call or text Dr. Ruth or a team member.